Why being a working mom just isn't for me.

So you know how I've been MIA for a few months?  

Well, it's because I have been working full time in Burley. A potato plant, at that. 

When I tell people that I have an internship at a potato plant, most of the time I get, "What do you do there?"

Count my teeth, people, they're all there! Do you think a college graduate would be peeling potatoes and shoveling scraps?

I'd politely reply, "Oh I'm a safety intern there. I make sure that you don't have any fingers in your french fries." Most people aren't amused by that last part. I don't know why.

Although it really wasn't true. I really had no idea if someone's phalanges were getting mangled up in your side-order. But I did save lives. At least, I would like to think so.

I made lockout/tagout programs which basically is that when someone needs to work on a machine or if a box is stuck and then need to fix the jam, I create a program that they can refer to so they know how to shut it off. Usually it's pretty self-explanatory on how to turn off something but there's a whole process and shiz. 

Now that you're all super impressed with my abilities and wisdom, let's move on to why it just wasn't for me.

Although I feel really blessed to have gotten the internship, I knew four weeks into it that working away from home just wasn't for me. At that point, I had 4 weeks down and only 16 more to go! Yipee...

It wasn't that it was hard to work, it was just so boring.  I didn't realize it until then, but I needed a more creative outlet. My boss didn't appreciate me hot gluing adornments on my reports or editing the pictures of equipment I took to have a whimsical look. See? It's now fashionable and functional.

Plus, it was too hard to be away from Jack-Jack; crying, whining, begging not to go. Plus Jack would cry some too.

 I  decided I would stick out the internship until the end and then make my choice. Maybe my, so to speak, work-muscles were weak and by the end, I would like it. Well I've made it to the end and I'm making my choice.

I choose Jack.

At first, I felt guilty that I didn't want to work and it wasn't because of what people said at work, or what people say women should do in magazines or on teh interwebz.

I was more afraid of what my professors would think and what my fellow co-students would say.

People, who coming from the same religion and standards that I have, that would judge me because I, "just graduated" and chose not to have a career. Them, even when taught the same standards and views on parenthood, that would pressure me into thinking staying at home is a mistake.

Now, that makes me sound like I think being a stay-at-home-mom is the thing to do. I realize how it makes me sound hollier-than-thou. I'm choosing to emulate my true calling while you selfishly work. Neener, neener, neener.

Actually, I don't give a rats tail if people decide to work or stay at home because I really don't care about what other people decide to do with their life. Want to become the first person to eat 100 lbs of cheese in a day? Do it. I don't care.

My point I am making is that in a world where there are so many pressures to do what is accepted as "right", let's just get off each other's back, people!

I am choosing to stay home and be a full time mom while managing my Etsy shop (which is actually a hard job) because that's what I like to do and right now, we can afford to do that. Maybe in the future, things will change but for now I'm happy with my decision.

P.S. Make sure to check out my shop being featured on GroopDealz for the next 3 days!


Tara said...

Good for you Jessica! As your oldest (and prettiest) sister I am very impressed that you stuck through the internship until the bitter end. I agree that all women have to make that difficult choice.


Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

I don't think I'd have survived that sort of internship either.

Jenna said...

I'm proud of you. Way to go! Also, I do want to eat 100 pounds of cheese in a day. It's a hard-knock life.

DaNelle said...

I think it's hilarious that you are saving fingers from becoming potatoes! People just don't get us.

DaNelle recently postedWhy I changed my mind about Homeschooling

Anonymous said...

Don't feel guilty for being happy and doing what you love.

Bev Feldman said...

Just popped in from SITS--I'm really enjoying your blog! I just came to the conclusion that when I do have kids I want to be at home with them AND work on my Etsy shop (literally wrote a blog post about this today). It was a hard decision to make, especally since I also felt like I am "supposed" to be working in a full-time job and also worried about what people would say/think, but in the end you need to do what is right for you and not what is "right" according to societal expectations. Enjoying being a stay at home mom and managing your Etsy shop!