A Strongly Worded Letter.

It's a running joke in our family to "write a letter". Like everyone on this plant that has ever done business with anyone, we've experienced bad customer service from time to time and every time we do, we always threat behind the company's back that we are going to write "a very strongly worded letter". I use the word "threaten" because usually that's all it was. We would never really follow through with it and instead, we would cry out our hurt feelings later that night in the shower with the water pouring over our head, biting on a rag.
You're not alone, Tobias Funke...
I recently had a customer service experience with a certain cell phone company, that shall remain nameless, but we'll call them Berizon for all intents and purposes. 

I haven't been all too thrilled with my phone. You see, I still live in the stone ages when it comes to cell phones so it's like I practically have a Nokia, circa 1990. I lug around a brick to which the only people who call me are salesmen. My stupid phone makes me look like a stupid, poor person to all of my cool friends and the worst part is that we pay $77 a month for it. I mean, if I wanted a useless brick to follow me around, I'd pay Mario Lopez to 'cause at least I could make fun of him to his face.

I did my research and found that basically any other service than Veri-ah, I mean, Berizon is cheaper than what I'm paying. It doesn't take a college graduate to figure that one out (although, I am so......). My plan was to go to Berizon and to make a deal with them: if they could hook me up, I'll stay with them, otherwise, I'm aborting this mission.

Now, I should mention that I'm not a confrontational person at all. If someone confronts me, I always do what the professionals say: curl up in the fetal position. Or maybe that was when a bear confronts you... Either way, this girl wets her panties at the word "confront".

Naturally, I had to pump myself up in front of the bathroom mirror first. I rehearsed my entire conversation which went something like this:
Me: "You are going to give me unlimited texting for no additional charge 'cause I'm sick of it! We're poor and I know you can do it Mr. Berizon guy!" 'Cmon, Jessica, you can do this. Don't look down when you're talking, you stupid B!^&#! Why are you crying? Be tough! You are a loyal customer that won't take no for an answer!

I was pumped walking into that store AND....
I accomplished nothing.

The Berizon guy told us to beat it and chased us out of the store with a rolled up newspaper. Not really, but verbally, it felt so. As we were driving home, I told Tyler that I was going to write a very strongly worded letter. He didn't believe me but he also didn't realize just how hurt my feelings were. It was as if some cliche something was doing something cliche inside of me, or whatever. I was upset, okay?

So I did write a letter (stick that in your pipe and smoke it Tyler and Berizon) and sent it in. I'll let you know if anything epic happens but in the meantime, be proud of your running mama for taking the first steps in being confrontational; writing a very strongly worded letter.


Tara said...

Hmmm...I am left clueless as to who Berizon is. Nothing off the top of my head.


DaNelle said...

I am laughing so hard I am crying! Jessica you just made my day!

Jenna said...

Oh, I'm the same way. Hence why I have a blog. It make confrontation less scary for sure.

In real life, I make Dillon do all that confrontation stuff while I cry in the shower in my cut-offs.

Ann Barlow said...

That is a huge step for you, Bessica!